i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
that's an acceptable place to lick
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
