R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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