i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.