everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize