I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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