Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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