nut hugger
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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