do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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