Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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