You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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