We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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