Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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