Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
