Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
