what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Princesses don't give blow jobs
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
