operation harelip BJ is a go
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
