I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
