Im at strip club and am horny
Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.