you guys were way drunker than both of me
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
