How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
