Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
do nipples grow back?
Randomize