How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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