Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
