I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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