rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I enjoy the company of your penis
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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