I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
