I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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