Insert tab A into swedish slot B
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating