You're my little dorito
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize