Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
and you fell through a lawn chair
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize