I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
