She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
