but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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