I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
