You can't special order awesome
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
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