too bad you live with your parents still
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
These 25 Rude People Ruined Movies for Everyone Else
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
23 Cringeworthy Responses to “I Love You”
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?