So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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