Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
ugly people sure do ruin things
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I am one with the molecules
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
