Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
