I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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