I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize