is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
