I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
