no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Floor bacon is actually really good
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
