Texts From Last Night

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  (229): View more from Georgia

  my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore

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  (229): my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore http://tfl.nu/2olf
  Replies (20) Good night (3276) Bad night (683)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises

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  (407): I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises http://tfl.nu/5v7b
  Replies (8) Good night (2776) Bad night (648)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"

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  (978): please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker" http://tfl.nu/kgaf
  Replies (15) Good night (2019) Bad night (5457)
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  (650): View more from California

  OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.

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  (650): OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS. http://tfl.nu/26xz
  Replies (37) Good night (9774) Bad night (2132)
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  (831): View more from California

  maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick

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  (831): maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick http://tfl.nu/1wa4
  Replies (3) Good night (658) Bad night (1366)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back

  (906): View more from Michigan

  I resent that

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  (989): If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back (906): I resent that http://tfl.nu/qneu
  Replies (6) Good night (2886) Bad night (1626)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader

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  (208): I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader http://tfl.nu/v8oi
  Replies (3) Good night (1420) Bad night (806)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus

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  (832): i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus http://tfl.nu/kvpc
  Replies (2) Good night (1545) Bad night (522)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !

  (779): View more from Illinois

  You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.

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  (815): Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him ! (779): You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right. http://tfl.nu/e8wh
  Replies (7) Good night (993) Bad night (685)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.

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  (330): He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life. http://tfl.nu/pmkh
  Replies (5) Good night (1097) Bad night (425)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?

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  (231): Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again? http://tfl.nu/uf7o
  Replies (5) Good night (422) Bad night (659)
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  (881): View more from

  I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.

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  (881): I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull. http://tfl.nu/l3jf
  Replies (33) Good night (1334) Bad night (461)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know

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  (203): Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know http://tfl.nu/vvh5
  Replies (5) Good night (468) Bad night (962)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion

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  (413): Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion http://tfl.nu/n5in
  Replies (2) Good night (306) Bad night (598)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?

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  (412): What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it? http://tfl.nu/fsay
  Replies (9) Good night (463) Bad night (269)

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