ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
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