It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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