I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
