guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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