Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
