Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
